Chapter 4: Summarizer Kaylee Moore

Chapter 4 focused on dating, relationships and love. It seemed to be the hardest part of Vincent’s Journey as Ned. She begins the chapter learning the ropes of dating with her friend Curtis. They are at a sports bar and Ned jumps in too quickly to hit on a group of women. This is where he receives his first form of rejection, the brush off. At first, Ned is not fazed by the rejection and accepts it but as the night continues he realizes how small men feel after being rejected so many times by women. Vincent elaborates a lot in this chapter about the qualities women are looking for in a man, and how she speculates that women sometimes have absolutely no idea what they are looking for really. They want a man to be strong and manly, but they want them to be sensitive and show their true colors and feelings as well. Men are in a constant battle at achieving both of these personas. Vincent sympathizes a lot with men in this chapter stating that it is a wonder that men and women even come together in the first place.
Also, Vincent decides in chapter 4 that she will not reveal her secret to the women she dated unless she had a few successful dates with them. This occurred with three women, and each of them took the reveal in very different ways. One of these women was Sasha. Their first date consisted of her babbling on and on about things that any man would be bored with during a coffee date. Ned executed some ruder comments towards the end of the date, just to see what kind of reaction he would get. Her trite and quick reactions to his questions showed Ned that Sasha was open to answering anything. She eventually reveals that she is in love with a married man, and that made Ned even more interested in her. The two exchange e-mails on a frequent basis. Vincent comments how her words were what won her over in the eyes of her daters. They got a feel for her writing and communication, and then after a while of internet dating with e-mails was when they decided to meet with Ned. Eventually came the time where Sasha and Ned wanted to go to bed together. Vincent explained to Sasha her secret, and at first Sasha needed time to get used to the fact that Ned was actually a woman. She normally wouldn’t succumb to lesbianism she admitted, but she still went to bed with Vincent, intrigued by the book and the research she was doing.
Anna, another woman Ned revealed himself too, was completely against him actually being a woman. Ned was not big enough for her in the first place. She liked a bigger guy to take control, and was strictly heterosexual. She was not going to budge.
Sally was the last woman Ned revealed himself too. She was shocked, but admitted she thought something was off. She particularly mentioned how un-hairy Ned was for a man. She was insecure that Ned only asked her out for research purposes and because of this grew a little bit angry with Ned. However, she claimed she still wanted to keep seeing Ned. Eventually, the two fell apart and Sally began seeing a man and brushed Ned off.
What was interesting to me about this chapter was the willingness of most women to accept Ned as a woman. Most were very open minded to the idea, intrigued by the research as well as the book she was writing. Dating and carrying on relationships as a man was a daunting task for Ned, and Vincent sympathized with men frequently throughout the chapter. She portrayed to her readers a deeper understanding of the male side of dating and how hard women do really make it for them.